Whilst getting my brakes checked at the mall, I stopped in the local theater to see Inside Man. The new Denzel Washington movie. Or is it the new Clive Owen movie? Or wait! The new Jodie Foster movie? I'm so confused. And not just because of the cast.
The plot was long and boring. It is a movie about a bank robbery, but don't worry because no money was taken. (Except for mine at the ticket window!). In fact its a movie about nothing. Because nothing happens! I kept waiting for suspense. Not there. Drama! Not there. Clever plot? Nope.
There are no dead bodies and no sex scene. Boring. Oh sure there's a few times you wonder where the mysterious plot is going, and there are a few pithy lines and scenes that make you crack a smile or two, and a tidy happy wrap up at the end, but not enough to save this bore fest.
I had hoped for a thrilling cat and mouse game between Clive Owen's character, Dalton Russel and Denzel as Detective Keith Frazier (That's Frazier with a Z), reminiscent of the banter between Bruce Willis and Alan Rickman as the terrorist/thief Hans Gruber in Die Hard.
Instead I got something as exiting as watching paint dry. Clive's character pulls the wool over Denzels eyes the whole movie even to the end, which is surprising since its a Spike Lee (Malcom X) movie.
Whatever you do, DO NOT check out this movie.