Stardust

Ah TRUE love....don't ya just HATE it? Miracle Max said: "Sonny, true love is the greatest thing, in the world-except for a nice MLT - mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe." [smacks his lips] But that's what fairy tales are made of and Stardust has all the elements of a grand Happily Ever After.

Tristran Thorne (Charlie Cox), a young hero from England embarks on a romantic quest to bring back a fallen star as a token of his love for beautiful, Victoria (Sienna Miller). This quest takes him into another land, Stormhold, a magical realm where the star in question has transformed into Yvaine (Claire Danes).

She's blonde and whiny at first (I guess falling from space will do that to you). Tristan captures her and they go on an adventure trying to return to Tristan's home before Victoria's birthday. On the way they encounter a dread sky pirate named Shakespeare (Robert De Niro) that catches and sells lightning. It turns out the pirate has a bit of a frilly secret and is a "Twinkle Toes". (Sorry that was spoiler). I guess De Niro was tired of playing psychos and mobsters and decided to try something a little lighter....in the loafers that is.

Stormhold is home to a rapidly dwindling family of fratricidal princes vying for the throne. The last men standing, Septimus and Primus (Mark Strong and Jason Flemyng) are also after the star, glumly observed from the spectral sidelines by their ghostly five murdered brothers. (Was this idea stolen from Harry Potter?)

Then there's the wicked witch Lamia (Michelle Pfeiffer) and her two evil sisters. Their magic is on the wane, but a fresh injection of stardust will restore their youth and vitality. Lamia means to intercept Yvaine, pluck out her heart and eat it raw. Michelle shows she still has the magic to be a star in her own right.

Adapted from Neil Gaiman's novel by Jane Goldman and director Matthew Vaughn, "Stardust" starts off with a narrative prologue from Sir Ian McKellen. The film score pounds you along nicely, and add to that some excellent special effects and this is an easy way to spend the afternoon at a matinee. Catch this falling star and check out Stardust!

Bourne Ultimatum

Super spy Jason Bourne is back and everybody wanted to see him this weekend! He broke box office records earning 70 million! This third in the series reminded me much of the second one except he has no girlfriend (she's dead or eliminated as they say in the business). So Bourne (Matt Damon) is once again after the people that created him and are trying to kill him.

Lots of fighting, killing, and car chases. They say he is the next "James Bond" but I'm not holding my breath. I was a little disappointed that they didn't do something more original rather than stick to the same -- Find Bourne, Chase Bourne, and try and Kill Bourne formula.

Also the cinematography is similar to the second film in that it is very "shaky." (Did they hire a camera man with Parkisons?). We learn more about Jason's mysterious past, but the character's including Jason Bourne were all flat and one dimensional, but perhaps you don't go to a Bourne movie for character depth. You go to see killing, fighting, and car chases!

Then this movie is for you! If you liked the first two Bourne adventures then you like this CIA is evil thrill ride! Check it out! (and watch out for the snipers!)

1408

Oh yeah! Cusack is back! I love his films. This one is about Mike Enslin (Cusack), a writer who travels the country to visit locales noted for their haunted nature. Only, in all the years that Enslin has been doing so, he’s never seen anything unusual. He’s a burned-out, atheistic skeptic. While checking the mail one day he receives an anonymous post card warning him not to stay in Room 1408 in the Dolphin Hotel, which is exactly what he plans to do. It will make a nice final chapter, he reckons, for his next book, Haunted Hotel Rooms.

This is not a horror film. It's not a slasher gorefest. Thank goodness it's just a good old fashion scary movie! (BTW that's why I like the Blair Witch Project). Add to that I was the only one in the theater today watching this. ("I want my mommy!" was uttered by me more than once)

The manager of the Dolphin, Gerald Olin (Sam Jackson, in a small but effective role), doesn’t want Enslin staying in the room, which — since 1912 — has been the final resting place for 56 guests, many of whom have met grisly, self-inflicted deaths and others, untimely natural ones. Olin closed the room to the public in the 70s, but because of some manufactured loophole in a civil rights law, he’s forced to allow Enslin to occupy 1408, though he ominously warns him that no one has ever survived an entire hour. It’s not phantoms or specters, he says, it’s just an “evil -BLEEP- room.”

The real success of 1408 is the spot-on casting of Cusack — he’s convincing, he's real, and you find yourself pulling for him and cheering him on. If you like scary movies, this is a must see!

I guarantee you won't make it an hour with out getting the toast scarred out of you! Check into to room 1408!

Transformers

Transformers. This movie is more than meets the eye. I was a little too old for the Transformers cartoon when it came out and I missed that whole ride. I was thinking this movie might be a pile of junk. But I was pleasantly surprised.

Just like the recent Die Hard movie, I thought this film was a great “thrill ride” as any Summer Blockbuster should be! Shia Labeauof (Sam Witwicky), who recently starred in the thriller, Disturbia, does an excellent job as a high-energy high school student with only two goals in his life. A car and a girl.

As we learn in the movie, “A car picks the man.” So a yellow and black Camaro picks Sam. He then chases after his girl (Megan Fox). Her last name is rather fitting. But his plans are soon interrupted when he finds himself in a tug of war between an alien race of robots known as the Autobots (good guys) and the Decepticons (bad robots). The Decepticon motto is “Punish and Enslave.”

Transformers has more high-octane action than Paris Hilton, a stunning visual style, includes just the right amount of humor, has a very excellent cast of supporting characters. Sam’s parents are hilarious!! Don’t be deceived however, this is not a kids movie. Its PG-13 for language, violence, and sexual innuendo.

So transform a dull evening into a fun one and check out Transformers!

1-18-08

1-18-08

HP: Order of the Phoenix

No not Hewlett Packard -- Harry Potter of course! I am saving Transformers to see with a friend. (BTW...Don't buy the toys if you have kids, they are a parents nightmare!) So in the mean time I saw the fifth installment of the Harry Potter series.

Unfortunately it was same old same old standard Harry Potter fare. Something amusing happens to Harry's "muggle" family, (if you don't know what a 'muggle' is then you probably won't see this film and can stop reading now), then Harry is attacked and gets in trouble, there's a big mystery, tension with his friends, blah, blah, blah, big boss battle at the end and everyone lives happily ever after. Nothing new under the sun except perhaps an exceptionally annoying female character who tries to take over Hogwarts.

Let me just say, I hate annoying characters! Give me evil, silly, funny, strong, powerful, cunning, or even dull characters, but I can't stand two hours of an annoying over the top character. I understand that's what the film makers were shooting for, and they hit the mark, but good grief an annoying character makes for an annoying movie!

If you are a Harry Potter Movie fan, you'll go see this. If you are a fan of the Books, you'll go see this and probably hate it as it falls short of full filling the rich story found in the book. Most book-to-movies are like that though. But basically I think it is great to see your favorite characters (and annoying ones) come to life on the big screen. So check it out, you little owls!

New Family Member

Well My oldest son has been asking for a dog since he was four. We told him he could have one when he turned eight and his little brother turned four. Say hello to Lacy!

How about those blue glowing "Zombie" dog eyes??

Ratatouille

This latest animated film from PIXAR was anything but cheesey!

I haven't enjoyed an animated film this much since the Incredibles. And I think it is no coincidence that Ratatouille is directed by the same man that directed the Incredibles, Academy Award winning director Brad Bird!

The story of course is about a country rat wanting to rise above the squalor, garbage eating, and thieving that his family and friends thrive on. He finds himself in the kitchen of a once five star restaurant in need of a little inspiration. He teams up with the kitchen garbage boy (see the irony!) and together they have to outwit the head chef, skinner (Sir Ian Holm), and impress France's greatest critic, Ego (Peter O'Toole).

The film had a great story, character depth, suspense, drama, love interest, self discovery all mixed with a perfect blend of humor! It was a perfect meal for a movie goer and though it may have been a tad slow for kids at a couple of points, I still thought it was fabulous! This might be the first film I give a five star rating in over two years.

Grab the kids and buy them the snack pack, or make it a date night movie and check out this delicacy of an animated film!

Live Free or Die Hard

I just saw the fourth installment of the DIE HARD series yesterday. I loved the first Die Hard movie. I must say that Die Hard 2, and Die Hard with a vengeance aka Die Hard 3, not so much.

They just didn't seem to have that same original "Die Hard" charm. The plots were so-so and the bad guys silly. Of course it's hard to live up to the fantastic performance as Allen Rickman's Hans Gruber.

In Die Hard four, Live Free or Die Hard, America is under attack by cyber terrorist. They are shutting down everything hooked to a PC!! (Oh no! How will I write my in depth movie reviews? or keep up with Paris Hilton??) They shut down the transportation networks, the government offices, the power grid, and the financial districts.

Along comes our favorite witty and sarcastic NYPD Detective, John McClane played by Bruce Willis. He's just doing his everyday job (at 3 a.m.) and once again gets caught up in the bad guy's evil plot. Much to their dismay. Otherwise their insidious plans would have went off without a hitch.

I loved this movie! It was a great return to the Hero Action genre. Bruce was badass as usual (which is how I like my action heroes) and they kept the main bad guy low key, he wasn't silly or over the top. Great action scenes, excellent fight scenes, car chases, lots of guns, explosions, etc. etc. This time John doesn't get in a domestic fight with his ex-wife, it's their daughter, Lucy played by Mary Elizabeth Winstead. She did a great job! Even a little better than McClane's comedic relief sidekick, Justin Long whom I haven't seen since Herbie Fully Loaded. (That was driving me crazy trying to remember where I knew him from). And thankfully no annoying reporter guy (William Atherton).

Die Hard fans (pun intended), should rush madly to the theater, zigging in and out of traffic and check out DH4!!!!!

Fantastic Four: ROTSS

Don't count on the Fantastic Four to save you! Count on the Silver Surfer!! He stole the show! The Fantastic Four was anything but fantastic. All they did was bumble around, talk about having babies, switch powers, and generally fall flat. The human torch was pithy and wity as usual, but that was as good as it got.

A cosmic doom is coming to earth and the Silver Surfer is the harbinger of death as he arrives to punch holes in the planet so this dark space cloud can suck all the energy out of the planet's core.
With with the help of their old friend Dr. Doom, they try and catch the surfer.

This movie felt a lot like the first one. The actor's still feel like they are trying to get a handle on their character's. There wasn't really anything awful, but at the same time nothing...well fantastic. The surfer dood on the other hand was very cool. (pardon the pun).

The cgi effects were well done and film has a lot of eye candy, and the F4 get a fancy new flying car to cruise around in. Bottomline, if you are a marvel fan, a F4 fan, then you'll go see this film and enjoy it. Otherwise, save it for a movie rental.

Ocean's 13

Danny Ocean (George Clooney) is back with his team of conniving criminals in the third Ocean's film. Is three a charm?

This time it's not for the money, it's for revenge. A big shot casino and hotel owner played by Al Pachino, double crosses their good friend Ruben Tishkoff (Elliott Gould) and nearly kills him. So Danny Ocean calls in his friends for a convoluted scheme to get Bank (Pachino). I have to say this film lost the charm that the first one had.

I had a hard time following the plot which seemed to switch from time to time with so many different characters popping in and out, even Andy Garcia is back. There was just way too much going on and I never seemed to care about the character's like I did in the first film.

There is no love interest in this third escapade either. What? No Julia? Oh there's a girl all right. Ellen Barkin. Sorry Ellen you were hot back in the day, but please. Cameron Diaz see your future!

But she never willingly gets involved with any of the crew. At any rate Al Pachino's character isn't the only one that gets ripped off with this movie.

Save your poker chips and check it out on cable!

POTC - At World's End

This third installment of the pirates trilogy was fantastic! I loved every minute of this summer blockbuster! In fact, I dare say I liked it better than the second one, Dead Man's Chest. It has all your favorite characters back, and with that, some superb acting.

This film is a little edgier and darker than the previous two and is definitely not a kid's flick. But the film was fun and the action as exciting as a Disney ride. I didn't want it to stop. Even at the end, they set off on a new adventure and I was like, "Yes! Let's go. I'm on board for that!"

The only minor problems I had with the film was that is was a tad convoluted in the middle as they set the story up and I could not tell which was a side story and which was the main story. Secondly, Jack Sparrow has these moments where he converses with multiple other Jack Sparrows. That was a little over the top and didn't work well.

Some friends of mine suggested that they did this because the character didn't have as much screen time as in the past and so they were trying to compensate. But regardless the film still was awesome and I had a great time watching the crew, Geoffrey Rush, Bill Nighy, Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, and the lovely Keira Knightley go on one more adventure.

Oh, there was one other part I forgot to mention. I was very nervous when I heard that Keith Richards, whom Depp modeled Jack Sparrow after, was going to play his father. I was scared it would be silly and stupid and be a worthless part of a great movie. But the scene(s) were fabulous! They pulled it off famously and Keith Richards did a fine job of the part. I was very happy with it.

So hoist the sails, batten the hatches, and fire the cannons straight to the theater to check out Pirates of the Caribbean - At World's End!! Savvy?

28 Weeks Later...

Well it was a zombie movie! But these zombies are not the slow, moaning, and shuffling zombies you may be used to. These zombies are Olympic sprinters!! They run. They chase. They run some more and they beat on the glass until bloody. (That never gets old does it?)

As if running and hiding from raging zombies wasn't enough, you also have to dodge sniper bullets and out run napalm.

If you want a movie with blood and guts and killing, this is your film. The soldier/sniper that helps the kids escape the city was my favorite character. The film was interesting, but I didn't think it lived up to the original. If you can't wait till October for some zombie loving, then check out 28 weeks later!

Spiderman 3

Spiderman 3 is back in black! Three villains; Goblin, Sandman, Venom. Three times the fun? More like three times the tears! This movie has more crying in it than an episode of Little House on the Prairie! Don't get me wrong, there was plenty of action and I liked the movie overall, but be prepared for a couple of intertwining love stories that try and tug at the old heart strings.

Spiderman's super powers are enhanced when an alien symbiont binds with him creating a black copy of his suit. But it has side effects. Namely Peter becomes meaner and more aggressive. This film is long, 2 and half hours plus previews, because they run so many subplots. There was one scene they could have completely cut out. Parker takes a date, (not MJ) to a jazz club where MJ is working. He does this funky jazz dance all over the club. A weird scene to show how the black suit is effecting him. (Spiderman the musical!) I think it would have been a good "extra" to put on the DVD when it comes out.

JK Simmons is back as the brash Jonah Jameson, along with Ted Raimi for comic relief. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that Ted is related to the director Sam Raimi. The special effects were decent as usual, but nothing jumped out at me as Amazing. Speaking of which, Stan Lee, the creator of your friendly neighborhood spidey, makes a cameo. Nuff said.

If you are a super hero fan, if you loved the first two spider movies, then you must see this blockbuster, just because. So swing over to your local theater and check it out!

NEXT

Daja vu? Oh wait that is the Denzel Washington movie where he sees something really bad happen in the future and then tries to stop it. I didn't see that movie, so I can't really compare NEXT to that one. I had low expectations for this film so I was pleasantly surprised to find that I liked it pretty well.

Nick Cage plays Chris Johnson, a.k.a Frank Cadillac a magician with a special talent. He can see about two minutes ahead in the future and then change it if he wants. Julie Anne Moore, plays FBI Agent Callie Ferris who has clued in to Johnson's special power.

Currently some sissy French terrorists have smuggled a nuke into the U.S. and want to set it off for kicks and jollys. The plot never really gets to deep into the terrorists motivations. (Where's Jack Bauer when ya need him?) Anyway it doesn't really matter why, we just want to see Johnson's parlor trick put into action.

Early on Chris finds that a certain female, Liz, played by Jessica Biel (yes folks the sexiest woman alive) can extend his future seeing powers by hours. So Chris chases Liz and Ferris chases Chris trying to get him to help stop the big bomb from going off. (Confused yet?)

Nick Cage is having a bit of a dry spell lately. Johnny Blaze didn't really set me on fire in Ghost Rider, now this character is a reluctant, washed up, loser who somehow charms the sexiest woman alive? (Why did I like this movie again? I forget.) And what was with that hair? He had dyed jet black hair and hair extensions. It was long and stringy and I suppose represented his strung out life? But at least when they give Bruce Willis hair, it looks real!

It was an interesting story and a neat idea for someone to be able to see a few minutes into the future. It was charming. But overall, save your popcorn money for Spiderman 3 and catch NEXT next time you see it on cable!

HOT FUZZ

This movie was extremely funny! If you saw Shaun of the Dead and loved it as I did, then this one is a must see. It's almost a sequel as it reunites Nick Frost and Simon Pegg as police partners in a sleepy English village where all is not as it seems.

I was chuckling (not giggling, that's what girls do.) at the opening scene as Simon Pegg comes marching into the police station. Nothing funny about it, I just knew the absurd comedy was coming and I was anticipating laughing my arse off.

Despite being a bit slapstick, the film actually has a decent plot, er well a decent story. And the British actors played their roles brilliantly. Even defunct bond, Timothy Dalton does a superb job as a wacky, off kilter supermarket manager.

The climax of the film is worth the full price of admission. It was freaking amazing and totally hilarious! If you are in the mood for some absurd humor and non-stop laughs check out Hot Fuzz as soon as possible. Don't get pulled over for speeding!

Perfect Stranger

I knew who the killer was before the preview trailers ended. I had it all figured out. I was wrong. They got me. It was a great twist at the end that I did not see coming. Was Perfect Stranger a perfect murder mystery movie? Maybe it had all the elements of a whodoneit, but they dropped off the "thriller" part.

I never felt tense the whole movie. In fact I was just relaxed watching the story unfold, still confident I had it solved. I like Halle Berry, and I love Bruce Willis, so the film had that going for it. I also thought the characters were well developed. There was quite a bit of exposition, some of which was shown in flashbacks, but once that was out of the way, the character interaction began.

Halle Berry's character, Rowena Price is an investigative reporter that is convinced Harrison Hill (Bruce Willis), a powerful Ad Executive has killed her childhood friend and she is determined to prove it. I felt the chemistry between Bruce and Halle was forced. It didn't come naturally. Bruce really needs to stick to what he does best. Kill bad guys.

Several supporting roles pop in and out of Rowena's hectic life, most notably her tech savy partner, Miles Hailey played by Giovanni Ribisi whose character has a glaring crush on her. (Who doesn't? Why don't stars ever stalk anyone? "I was at the market yesterday, picking up some perogis, and there was Halle again! She followed me from the ice creme cases to fruits and veggies! Sheesh!")

Well as I said this movie was no thrill ride like Vacancy was. (Go see that one!) The only cool part was the twist at the end and perhaps smarter people than me saw it coming and if so kudos to you!

Vacancy

I loved this movie! If horror flicks of the "Psycho" genre are your thing, then Vacancy is a must see! It was an intense thrill ride. A bit predictable, but director Nimrod Anatal (I'll have to think twice before calling someone a nimrod now), more than made up for it with an excellent cast, Kate Beckinsale and Luke Wilson, and he never let the suspense die down from start to finish.

Amy and David Fox are lost on the back roads in the middle of nowhere. We quickly learn their marriage is falling apart and as it turns out, so is their car. They end up stranded at a flea bag, roach infested motel managed by Frank Whaley (Mason).

But they don't get any rest here as they soon learn that guests literally check-in but don't check-out. Mason is running a little snuff-film factory at his motel, and Amy and David realize they are the stars of the next film.

I was a little afraid Luke Wilson would revert to his usual sleepy eyed and dim witted drawl when he spoke, but I was pleasantly surprised he sounded like a normal married man on the edge of divorce. He did a great job and casting him turned out to be a good call. Same goes for Frank Whaley being cast in his role. He usually plays snarky side kicks for comedy relief but he pulls off the snarky psycho bit rather well. I guess it wasn't much of a stretch to go from laughs to screams!

If you're looking for a good jump out of your seat scream flick, check out Vacancy!

Disturbia

This is a movie that takes place in the middle American suburbs. This is the scary version of the Tom Hanks movie, The Burbs. Which is a must see comedy by the way! Disturbia stars Shia LaBeouf (what a name) who plays Kale, a high school student that lost his dad in a car crash a year ago. Kale was driving and saw his dad die, so he has issues.

Kale punches a teacher in the face at school near the end of the year and is ordered to spend the summer under house arrest. He is fitted with an electronic ankle bracelet that won't allow him to leave his yard, or else the cops come running. The real horror begins as his mother, Julie played by Carrie-Anne Moss (Trinity/Matrix), closes his itunes account (gasp), snips the power cord to his Hi-Def TV in his room (scream!), and cancels his XBOX LIVE account (run from the theater in terror now!!).

Fortunately she didn't take his PSP! But with all his other entertainment laid to waste Kale soon busies himself with spying on the neighbors. The most interesting of which is the hot new neighbor, Ashley (Sahra Roemer). She has just moved in from the city with her parents and he quickly becomes obsessed with watching her. (who wouldn’t?). She catches him peeping with his buddy from school and oddly they all become fast friends.

I was an hour into the movie and I was like where is the psycho path? Where are the dead bodies? The Horror? Was this a scary movie or Napoleon Dynamite? They tease us with a couple of scenes where Kale discovers a few clues and starts to suspect his neighbor is a killer, but they keep us guessing till the climatic end. Until then it’s just a coming of age flick and a spoiled teenager fighting his demons (and two or three little neighborhood kids.) That’s why I give it a 3 out of 5. David Morse does a fair job of being the creepy guy next door, and the film picks up a little bit at the end, but to steal a line from the girlsonfilmshow, catch it on cable!

TMNT

Okay, Okay...no funny remarks....oh wait, I never get ANY remarks! Yes I saw an animated film this Friday! I got two boys that love ninjas, mutant turtles, and lottsa of fighting!! The boys were outta school so it was only fitting to raise them in the Friday tradition of catching a flick.

As to the TMNT (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for those of you not in the know) movie, I thought the animation was amazing! Not that bubble-gum looking eye candy that PIXAR and DISNEY usually shovel. It was dark and REAL looking. Loved it. IMAGI Animation studios did a superb job.


I liked the rockin soundtrack as well, scored by Klaus Badelt. There were a few powerhouse voices provided by the likes of Patrick Stewart (Maximillian Winters), April O'Neil gets an upgrade in this version and gets to kick some bad guy butt with the Terrapin Tornadoes. She is voiced by Sarah Michelle Gellar, (Go Buffy!). The film is narrated by Lawernce Fishburne.

The story was mediocre. I had hoped they would avoid the infighting between the reptilian brothers, and just let them fight stuff, but it was not to be. Mostly Leonardo and Raphael are at each other's throats. But there is plenty of fighting monsters and of course their arch enemies the Foot Ninja Clan. Thankfully Shredder was not the big bad guy of the film.

Well if you want to see some great animation and you have some mutants of your own at home. Load em up in the mini van and head to the movies!

SHOOTER

This movie reminds me of the Bourne Identity. Which is better? Well I haven't seen Identity in a while, so I'm not sure but I think I liked Bourne Identity a little better than Shooter. Mostly because Bourne Identity had a more interesting hook, Jason Bourne couldn't remember who he was. Still I enjoyed shooter, even if it got a little campy at the end.

It starts out introducing us to Bob Lee Swagger (Wahlburg), a special forces sniper. The mission he is on doesn't end real well and three years pass and we find Bob being a recluse in the mountains, a hunting dog his only companion, almost a una-bomber type, except he does use technology.

Well one day the government shows up saying they need his expertise. They play on his patriotism and he says he'll help. That's when the plot and the plot twists kick in. This movie didn't "WOW" me like Casino Royale or 300, but it was a great matinee. Wahlburg does a decent job, and looks cut for the part. It also stars Danny Glover who should really just stick to Lethal Weapon sequels.

If you haven't seen 300, go see that. If you have seen it and are looking for something new at the popcorn stand, take a shot at Shooter and check it out!

300

Buttered popcorn? Check! Frosty Cola? Check! Darkened theater? Check! The most Epic battle movie since Lord of the Rings? Double Check! Ahhh. You could not ask for a much better day at the movies. 300 delivers! Outstanding story, excellent acting, nothing over the top, just unwavering discipline and devotion to the ideals all free peoples hold dear. And an ageless truism that we as Americans know so well today...Freedom is not Free.

Call the baby sitters and march to the theater to check out this dark tale of ancient Sparta! It's a must see!

Ghost Rider

Ghost Rider is a really nice looking film. The effects are superb and visually appealing. The licking flames, the chain whip, and the evil guys with their chilling touch of death all make it a great special effects film.

Unfortunately, the story is okay if not a little flat. And the fight scenes were so boring, I found myself yawning!

Ghost Rider, the devils bounty hunter, has to find four evil bad guys and destroy them. Each one in turn harasses the guy with the flaming head, but in just a minute he has them figured out and defeats them easily. Come on! After the Matrix and Spiderman set the bar for stunning and Epic fight scenes, Ghost Rider is a big let down in that department.

Speaking of let downs, I'm a huge Nicholas Cage fan boy, but I was expecting more from him as well. He usually has very funny and quirky breakouts when he play characters like this. And in Ghost Rider he tries to deliver. For example he stands before his mirror and makes boogey man faces at himself after turning into a walking zippo lighter the night before. But it failed to even bring a smile to my face. Has Nick lost it or was I in a foul mood? Who knows!

So if you are a marvel fan, and grew up on comics and super heroes as I did, then take your marshmallows and stick to the theater and catch a ride with the Ghost Rider!! PS- His side kick, Sam Elliot does a good job giving his usual gruff, grisly old man spiel. Check it out!

Breach

This movie was a rather somber tale, and there were only a couple of scenes the director attempts to get your pulse pounding, but fails.

The movie is based on the true-life story about how the FBI nailed the most damaging turncoat in American history, Robert Hanssen. We see everything through the eyes of Eric O'Neill (Ryan Phillippe), the young aspiring agent planted with Hanssen as his new assistant to gather information on the older man without knowing the true intent of the probe.

Chris Cooper plays a stern-faced and intimidating Robert Hanssen. He is an interesting character that sizes up and is suspicious of everyone he meets. What spy wouldn't be? We learn he is deeply religious, but also into porn as a hobby. I could never tell if one or the other was a facade.

As I stated, don't expect a thriller (only two Russian spies are killed), but it is a fascinating story and the film leaves us still wondering the "why" of it all.

Hanssen is currently serving his sentence at ADX Florence, a Supermax federal penitentiary in Florence, Colorado, where he spends 23 of 24 hours a day in solitary confinement.

This flick would be just as good on cable or a rental as it was on the big screen. I just had nothing better to do on President's Day. Check it out!!

Pan's Labyrinth

Decisions Decisions...I found myself on a business trip to Nashville this week and I always mix business with pleasure (who doesn't?). So there I stood at the door to the Regal theater trying to decide between Bable (oscar nominated for best picture) and some obscure Spanish film called Pan's Labyrinth about faun's and faeries.

Of course I chose the Labyrinth! (duh!) So I picked up my free popcorn (Tuesday's at Regal are free popcorn days if you're in the club and oh baby! I'm in!) and headed in excitedly to see what this mysterious film had to offer.

First you have to realize it is a Spanish film and therefore...that's right those crazy actors are all speaking Spanish. But like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, the sub-titles didn't bother me as much as I would have thought and I was able to enjoy the movie.

The story quickly catches your attention with a scene and a haunting lullaby from the end of the movie, but soon jumps into the main story of a young child and her pregnant mother traveling on the road in a bouncing late model car. The girl clutches her fairy tale books while the mother clutches her stomach. They arrive at a mill/farmhouse where the mother's new husband and father of the soon to be born baby brother is waiting for them. He is a tyrant of the Spanish army, currently hunting down rebels in the nearby hills. It's his brutality that give the film its "R" rating.

As the movie progresses, it rhythmically sways between the world of fantasy and the cruel harsh realities of real life. It transitions so well that at times you can't tell where fantasy ends and reality begins. The movie drags just slightly in the middle (like my reviews) and the end grows more predictable, but the story is strong, the CGI (Computer Generated Images) affects are brilliant, and the film reflects our own lives like a mirror. Don't we all fantasize just a bit to escape our real life doldrums (who uses that word any more?). We all dream of winning the lottery, or being famous, or living in a world with out war or global warming.

If you dare to enter the labyrinth, then check out Pan's Labyrinth and never trust a fawn.

Bill's Search Engine

Blood And Chocolate

Tasty little treat of a movie. They re-envision the age old were-wolf legend, there is no bone cracking, snout extending transformations we have come to expect in our Loup Garou films. Instead werefolk are a race born unto their own rather than a disease and their shape shifting into wolf form is more angelic than a painful uncontrollable curse.

But even though the movie is touted as being brought to you by the creators of Underworld, this is far from it. In fact there's more wolves than blood in the film, so it should have been called Wolves and Chocolate.

It's a Romeo and Juliet type story, with a female werewolf (Agnes Bruckner) defying her kind and falling in love with a human. We are treated to the PG-13 love affair, (who makes a PG-13 werewolf film?) and then the fur flies when they are found out. The character's and story were interesting enough to hold my attention and the cinematography was nice as well. If you are looking for a good Valentine's Day movie to take your loved one to, then check out Blood and Chocolate!!

Smoking Aces

Well I can't say for sure if my movie viewing experience has gone up or down this week, so we'll just say it remained ... level. Sorta like a patient that has flat-lined on the operating table. But have no fear! I am anxiously awaiting a couple of new flicks to roll off the celluloid assembly line and light my fire this year.

Nick Cage's Ghost Rider might be fun. I like Nick, can't wait to see National Treasure II. Also looking forward to 300 men. It'll be like football but with lots of swords and arrows! And that folks is right up my alley!

As for Smoking Aces, I guess the writer was smoking something when he wrote it. The first part of the film hand holds the audience in order to explain everything to us simple minded viewers. So we understand, it's a bunch of crazy hit men out to kill one crazy playboy of a man. Oh and there's some pissed off feds sprinkled in the mix.

Then there's the fun part. Lots of guns, lots of killing. I want to say this film reminds me of another movie where they build up to this big show down in a hotel...but I can't think of the name of it. Might be Domino.

Then after all the killing, we are introduced to the clever twist at the end which isn't so spectacular, not even close to the Usual Suspects, but again the audience is handheld while they explain it all to us and we go "Oh...I get it!"

Save your 5.75 and buy some dental floss and a new toothbrush, you're mouth will be happy and you'll be happy. PS - Don't tell the movie studio I gave this one a pass, or they might put a five dollar hit out on me!

The Hitcher

While driving across the desert, Jim (Zachary Knighton) and Grace (Sophia Bush) stop by the side of the road to pick up a hitchhiker — who turns out to be a murderous psychopath (Sean Bean).

While the couple quickly ditches their would-be assassin, the maniacal killer follows them along the dusty backroads and they engage in a nasty game of cat-and-mouse. A remake of the cult horror film starring Rutger Hauer, C. Thomas Howell and Jennifer Jason Lee.

If I had not seen such a dud last week I might have given this film a dud rating. However after seeing Children of Men, I can only go up. This is basically a film that has no real plot or point to it other than senseless violence and gore. They were even skimpy on the gratoitous sex. What an outrage! ;)

I was surprised that such a talented better known actor like Sean Bean would take such a low brow role after doing films like James Bond, and The Holy Lord of the Rings Triology. He only had about five lines in the whole movie. My favorite was when the police detective asked him why he was on a murderous rampage he replied. "Why not?" which is probably the same thing he said when he accepted the role. Hey, gotta pay the bills!

It's a definate pass at the theater, but if you see it on late one night on cable or there is nothing else to rent at the video store then catch a ride with The Hitcher!

Children of Men

"Children of Men" is set in the near future where the human race is on the brink of extinction.

Global violence, loss of civil liberties, illegal immigration, destruction of the environment, obsession with celebrity - all paint a bleak and depressing future. Oh wait those headlines are the same as today's headlines. Be warned this is a depressing movie with death and acute oppression around every corner.

Based on a novel by P.D. James, "Children of Men" shows a world were females have become infertile. No babies have been born for more than 18 years. The story takes place in the United Kingdom, where the military keeps order. Foreigners are rounded up, placed in detention camps and sent back to their home nations, with only a few Brits protesting the government's insensitive treatment.
The main character, Theo (Clive Owen) doesn't care that the world's demise seems inevitable. Once an activist, now a bureaucrat, he numbs himself with alcohol, or pot that he gets from his only friend, Jasper (Michael Caine), an aging hippie who lives in the country.

He is suddenly thrust into the chaos around him when a woman from his past, Julian (Julianne Moore), a leader in the refugee-rights movement, contacts him. Julian needs transit papers that will get refugee Kee (Clare-Hope Ashitey) out of the country and into the hands of the Human Project, a group devoted to saving mankind from self-destruction. Kee has a secret that could give the world hope again, but it also puts her in jeopardy.

Owen dose fine as the reluctant hero, but Michael Caine, who is usually a pleasure to watch comes off as an annoying over the top hippy whose only line seems to be "amigo!" Several of the other cast members all seems to have strange quirks as well making the film as painful as hearing the pots and pans rack in your kitchen fall and strike the tile floor.

As if that wasn't enough, the filmmaker must be a dog lover because nearly every scene of the movie has a yapping, whining, underfoot dog in it, which I found very distracting. I think the movie had potential to make a statement as to where the world is headed, but I lost that message in the unnecessary "noise" the other elements created.

Calvin and Hobbes

Happy Tanksgiving!!!

Casino Royale

I am a huge bond fan. Of course no one can out class Sean Connery, but I did think that Pierce Brosnan was the best looking bond and I loved his films.

I was disheartened when the franchise decided not to continue with Pierce, and I did not like the looks of the new guy, Daniel Craig.


However, a bond film is a bond film, and I was willing to give Craig a shot. While I still don't agree with his looks, or even his on screen charm as a perfect bond, he did an excellent job with the role. Casino Royale captured the style and feel of a some of the Connery films and yet added its own fresh style at the same time. We see the smooth, elegant, charming Bond, but at the same time a rough on the edge, sometimes out of control Bond as he learns the ropes (sometimes painfully) as a super secret agent.

The film had a great story, and thankfully the arch villan was not over the top and there was even a twist or two in the plot. And even no "over the top" stunts we have seen in recent bond films. They kept it simple, and I liked it.

This is a MUST see! Check it out or be eliminated!

Flags of Our Fathers

Shouldn't the title be FLAG of our fathers? I mean the movie is about the men that planted the FLAG in the famous picture taken in Iwo Jima. Although in the movie we learn that it was the second flag being planted on the hill that got in the picture. So maybe that explains the plural of the word flag in the title.

It was a good story, about the lives of the men that planted that flag, but the film was no Saving Private Ryan. Check it out!

If mankind completely disappeared...

It's Scorsese, so it's violent and vulgar, but excellent performances by Nicholson, DiCaprio,
and Damon. Even Mark Wahlberg steals the show as a stereotypical hard-ass police sergeant.

You'll wonder who the good guys are and who the bad guys are in this cop and robber thrill ride with a surprise ending.


Plenty of dead bodies and a steamy love scene.
Check it out now! Go on...do it!!

"We're all on our way out...so act accordingly!"
-Frank Costello (Jack Nicholson)

Talladega Nights

Over the top stupit humor!!!

What else did you expect??

White & Nerdy

Music video by "Weird Al" Yankovic from the album "Straight Outta Lynwood"

Miami Vice

I loved Miami Vice! Great nod to the TV show I watched growing up. Collin Ferrel is not as cool as Don Johnson was, but he did a good job.

The film has lots of action, guns, and girlfriends. A complex story of drugs and kidnapping. I didn't care for Barry Henley's Lt. Castillo
(Crockett and Tubbs boss), he played the jazz club owner in director Michael Mann's earlier film, Collateral.

The movie dragged a little in a few spots, and it's not a must see on the big screen, but overall I really enjoyed it! Check it out!

Clerks II

Vulgar. Porno humor. Inter-species Erotica?

But like a bad train wreck you can't look away. You have to watch just to see what they will say or do next.

If you liked Clerks I then most likely you'll cheer this encore presentation of your favorite losers.

I'd just rent it when it comes out on DVD and make sure the kids are away at camp.

POTC2 - Dead Man's Chest

Your favorite pirates arrrrgh back in the second installment of Pirates of the Caribbean - Dead Man's Chest. This film is pretty much more of the same. Pithy comments from CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), sea battles, daring sword fights, and scary villains.

This time rather than a ghostly crew of skeletons, its half-man half-seacreature bad guys, and a giant squid that eats ships. If you liked the first one, then you must catch its sequel even if it runs a bit long and has a cliff hanger ending that sets up for the third film in the trilogy.

Set sail for the theater and check it out!!

Superman Returns

The man of steel is back! This film borrows a lot from the original Superman movie with Christopher Reeves. Borrows a lot of lines. One thing noticeably missing is Lex Luthor's dufus toady, played by Ned Beatty. In the new movie, lex's thugs are all business, mean and nasty.

As to new comer, Brandon Routh, I have to say I liked Christopher Reeves 'Clark Kent' better. I thought Reeves was much funnier. On the other hand, Routh makes an excellent Superman.
The film goes a bit long. Seems Hollywood is making them that way ever since that little Lord of the Rings Trilogy. But overall I enjoyed the film. If you are a superhero fan... then fly faster than a speeding bullet and check out the return of Superman!

DVD Tuesday

Pierce Brosnan and Greg Kinnear star in this movie about the friendship between a professional hit man and a down-on-his-luck businessman.

Julian Noble (Brosnan) is an aging hit man who gets blue when he realizes he has no friends and no home. In a Mexico City hotel bar, he meets Danny Wright (Kinnear), who's there trying to put together some kind of business deal. Later, Julian shows up at the Wright home in Denver and moves in with Danny and his wife, who can't help being fascinated by their strange guest.

Buy it for your Pierce Brosnan collection!

CARS

Excellent animated film! A little long for the three-year old department, but kids age 7 to 70 will love it.

Larry the Cableguy should give up on the bigscreen dreams and stick to stand-up and voice overs.

Race to the movies and check this one out!!

PS - Stay for the credits!

DVD Tuesday

If you liked Numbah one then you'll like Underworld Evolution. It's more of the same. The story continues where the last one left off.

More fight scenes, more ded bodies, and a nekkid Kate Beckinsale.
Check it out!







Firewall was pretty good. Harrison is getting too old for this. (So am I). It was a predictable thriller, but fun for a night of movies at home and a bowl of Kettle Corn.

Check it out!!

Movie Friday

Friday was a double feature for me! First I watched the new X-Men The Last Stand. The humans, or Homo-sapiens as the mutants like to call them, have developed a "cure" for the mutant-X gene. In other words, it turns mutants into humans.

This of course doesn't set well with the mutant community and a war begins to brew, especially when the humans weaponize the "cure."

If you liked X-men one and two, then you will want to check out the final chapter of the trilogy.

But in my opinion, the first two movies were better. Maybe because this one had a different director. The film seem to never quite "take-off." It had a lot of potential but fizzled at points. Ian McKellan as Magneto and Patrick Stewart as the professor are of course always a pleasure to watch. They always raise the bar for any character they play.

Next I saw Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code. I had not read the book. I have read Angels and Demons, which most people say was better. Some were saying that if you had not read the book, you might be lost during the movie. I did not find this to be the case for myself. I followed along quite well and enjoyed the movie. I think it is a great fictional story.

Some critics say it's not Tom Hanks Best film, but I don't think it was supposed to be, He didn't have any over the top dramatic scenes, and he wasn't supposed to be funny either. He was playing an academic and I think he did a great job. For the second time today I got to see Ian McKellan in a different role as a philanthropist in search of the true Holy Grail.

I don't give both flicks a must see, but if you are an X-Men fan or a Dan Brown fan, check them out!

Movie Friday

Poseidon was a disaster. A disaster movie! It was A lot like the original. Same kind of feel, different character's though, younger perhaps. They tried to give the characters some depth, but I wasn't buying what they were trying to sell.

Even so, the thought of a huge cruise ship tumbling over on the ocean and people fighting for their lives, was still thrilling enough to keep my attention.

The ending of course was piled high with over the top suspense, but would else would I expect??

It was worth a matinee, but don't make it an all out night at the movies. Take the kids to see Over the Hedge instead. That looks hilarious!!

Movie Friday

Mission Impossible Three was awesome! I may have even liked it better than the first one. Great story, excellent bad guys and plot twists, and non-stop action from start to finish. I didn't want the movie to end. I give it a must see!

Check it out!

DVD Tuesday

I am looking forward to the remake, Poseidon, starring Josh Lucas and Kurt Russell. Check out the 1972 version on DVD!

MI:III

Tom Cruise is in theaters this weekend with Mission Impossible 3.
I couldn't make it, as my youngest carpet crawler was sick.

I hope to check it out next week!